Read Proverbs 19:16–23
Questions from the Scripture text: What does the one in v16a keep
initially? And what does this cause him to keep? What is the opposite of doing
this (v16b)? And what happens to that careless person? Upon whom does the man
in v17a have pity? To Whom, ultimately, is he lending? What will He do (v17b)?
What should one do with his son (v18a)? During what time? If he does not
chasten his son, then upon what does he set his heart (v18b)? To what sort of
man does v19a refer? What will happen to him? What does not actually help him
(v19b)? What must a son do (v20a)? Unto what end (v20b)? What is he tempted to
hope will be implemented (v21a)? But what will actually win out (v21b)? What
does the poor man desire for you to be (v22a, cf. v17a)? To whom is he superior
(v22b)? What leads to what end (v23a)? In what condition (v23b)? Unmarred by
what (v23c)?
What do godly parents hope for their children? Proverbs
19:16–23 looks forward to the midweek sermon. In these eight verses of Holy
Scripture, the Holy Spirit teaches us that parents hope in God to bless
their discipline and instruction, unto their children’s fearing YHWH, unto
their life and joy.
This section continues to build on what a man can get from his father,
which we have in the previous passage. And you remember that, especially when
it came to the obtaining of a wife, What a man receives from his father is a
subset of what he receives from God. This passage follows up on that, and it's
bookended by two statements, presenting this as a matter of life (v23) and death
(v16).
As a father gives the instruction of the Lord (cf. Eph 6:4), his children
learn to obey God by obeying dad (v16a). In this way, they come into the life-giving
fear of YHWH (v23a). And not just life, but fullness of joy (v23b) and absence
of harm (v23c). There's nothing that a father should want for his children more
than that they would have life, with abiding satisfaction, and not be harmed at
all—i.e. that his children would fear YHWH.
The fear of YHWH is displayed when you do good in situations where no one
but YHWH will repay you (v17)—when someone is kind to the poor (v17a, 22a) and
tells the truth (v22b). For this fear, discipline is necessary (v18a), because
we are wrathful by nature (v19, cf. Eph 6:4). Without discipline, a child will
remain foolish (v22) and be destroyed (v18b). Discipline brings us into
submission to YHWH’s will (v21b), rather than trying to exert our own (v21a).
For the parent, this knowledge makes it a matter of the heart. v18b is
sobering; to fail to discipline isn’t just to be lazy or naïve; it is to set
your heart on your child’s destruction. Parenting isn’t just a matter of
habits, but of the heart. There is a window of hope (v18a) that threatens to
slip away.
If they don't receive counsel and instruction, then they will continue to
be fools, and they will continue to need discipline. And once they get out of
the season of life in which discipline will help, they will bring themselves
more and more under the punishment and wrath of God. The goal is that by the
time the child comes into the next season of life, he will be wise (v20). Thus,
he will come to receive everything happily under the providence of God, in the
fear of God; and, even those things that others experience as evil, he will
know to be for his good in God’s mercy to him.
What is your attitude toward
disciplining children? What is your attitude toward being disciplined by the
Lord? How can you tell what value you are placing upon fearing Him? What sort
of life are you hoping to obtain?
Sample prayer: Father,
thank You for not setting Your heart on our destruction, but giving Christ for
us. And then giving us Your word by Your Spirit, Who uses it to bring us to
Christ and to grow us in Christ. We pray that Your Spirit would do so, even
with this passage that we have just heard. For we ask it in Jesus's Name, Amen!
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